Hometownless-ness

The full post can be found here.

"Placeless-ness." That's it. That's the word I've been looking for to describe how there doesn't seem to be a sense of belonging, as if in a hometown, anywhere I've been in the Metro; how my feet are eternally going, seemingly floating, to and fro, but never being able to plant them firmly on solid ground.

Except maybe inside the Diliman campus, which manages–even as it struggles–to retain its soul.

Hey, Jude

You are weathered and worn
Your petals soft and torn
The fading color

You have bent your shoulders
To hold the weight of the world
You will surely shatter

 — The Hush Sound, Magnolia

Sweet nostalgia

Aside from scraping my knees running up and down our neighborhood or playing house with tiny tea sets, squashed leaves and pebbles, my childhood afternoons consisted of trying to score some barya to buy sweets from nearby sari-sari stores. As a kid, I always looked forward to going home and spending the remaining of my baon for the day to buy 50-cent candies and one-peso snacks.

The chocolatey, milky, and fruity flavors of childhood are brought back to life with the cakes at The Baker's Table. In our Maginhawa date last Friday, Gabriel and I decided to try them for dessert, and from the get-go we agreed that will be back to try the other equally wonderful-looking creations based on our favorite childhood treats. 

Gabriel, the biggest caramel lover I have known, had the Butterball Cake while I had the Haw Haw Cake. They tasted just like the candies we had grown up with–the candies were even served with the cakes! I was expecting them to be cloyingly sweet and, given the big slice, I was wary I wouldn't be able to finish mine. How nice was it to be proved wrong when it comes to these cakes! My Haw Haw Cake had the perfect mix of milky, cheesy goodness and sweet but light vanilla chiffon fluffiness.

We are definitely going back to try the other cakes and go down the memory lane of Flat Tops and Choco Mallows and Milo and Viva Candies and Mik-Mik and Potchi! I for one can't wait for the new cakes on the works. Sweet Corn Cake? Why not! :D

I think this is the one time when the hashtag #happykid would be appropriate. :))

Pride and vanity

Vanity and pride are different things, though the words are often used synonymously. A person may be proud without being vain. Pride relates more to our opinion of ourselves, vanity to what we would have others think of us.

 — Jane Austen, Pride and Prejudice

Extraordinary ordinary

— Phil Kaye, Jesus Will Do It For Half (A Light Bulb Symphony, 2010)

 

The tongue-in-cheek cleverness notwithstanding, this poem hits home.

Because maybe, I was once guilty of romanticizing what it's like to be in a relationship, but have known better since. 

Because at the end of the day, it's not all about blinding fireworks and overwhelming waves nor about earth-shattering promises and immaculate ideals. Instead, it's how you learn more about each other, about life–together and as individuals–through all the mistakes and the flaws. It's in the quiet assurance to do one's best for each other, for the partnership, day after day, week after week. It's how you celebrate the little victories together, or how you could take comfort in each other's presence, whether in times of joy or fatigue. It's how the simplest, everyday moments could feel brand new after all.

Thanks for stopping by, Sarah and Phil.

"Every great story has a beginning, middle, and ending –
not necessarily in that order.
We are all great stories, but not all written as chapter books.
I know that there are moments not meant to be bound,
that we scribble too much in the margins to read our own page numbers." 

— Phil Kaye, Beginning, Middle and End

March began with a shoot for our family portrait, and heading straight to Makati (with Gabriel accompanying me :p) to line up for what could possibly the most stirring experience of my year. Spoken word poets Sarah Kay and Phil Kaye of Project V.O.I.C.E. came to Manila to hold performance nights and a workshop. Needless to say, I was thrilled and excited the moment the announcement came, and I had to fight through the huge demand for tickets to ensure I would not miss this rare chance.

It was some two years ago that I stumbled upon spoken word poetry, and Sarah and Phil. Since then, I have watched their videos countless times and marveled at the sheer beauty of their words, or how they encourage vulnerability and openness to the world, or how they find meanings in the simplest–but most profound–moments in their lives.

That Sunday night, I was among the 300 or so eager fans who waited hours in line to witness their performance. I even had an almost-encounter with them when, exactly as I went out of the restroom, they entered the venue through the back door. (What is it with me and restroom fangirl moments? Haha!)

The anticipation in the venue was palpable minutes before the show started. And when the two entered the stage, the cheers were deafening. It was absolutely a surreal experience to see them perform the pieces I have only watched, and read, on a screen.

And because they were in the Philippines, Phil and Sarah got a taste of the loud and rowdy ardent Pinoy audience. The loud "No!" answer to Sarah's "Are you in love?" question, Phil's ridiculous beluga whale joke, Sarah's uncontrolled giggling at the crowd's equally uncontrollable cheers, and Phil's "No, shit" response to a guy screaming "I love you!" at him–all of it and more–absolutely priceless. 

It felt like time flew by so fast, it was over before I knew what an extraordinary night I was having. When it was time to line up to purchase merchandise and a quick meet and greet, I wasn't able to do anything other than murmur "thanks for coming" and "great show." I don't even know if they heard me. At least I had the presence of mind to shake their hands. Haha. (Btw, both Phil and Sarah are just as gorgeous and beautiful and sweet in person. ♥)

That night, I also found new(-ish) friends. Kindred souls who also found, and continue to find, inspiration in Sarah's and Phil's works. It was an hour of basking in the wonder of poetry and the humanity that reside in all of us.

Thank you for the words, Phil and Sarah. Thank you for stopping by.