The last two months of 2013 witnessed a constant stream of reaffirmation of my connections with different groups of people. Despite the seeming routine in my daily life now, I know that I am still in a limbo, unsure of what to do next, anxious of things falling into a helpless disarray any moment. Reconnecting with people from the more "stable" and "definite" phases of my life, I guess, is like a reprieve from the uncertainty of the present.
In 2013, I changed jobs, surprisingly adapted well to the new environment (or so I hope), found new shows to follow, attended concerts of two favorite bands (I couldn't believe I was able to see live), watched as many theater shows and movies as I could, met new friends, discovered new books and authors to read, listened to new music, strengthened bonds with people who matter, pondered about the next step to take.
2013 has been the first full year I've been out of college, away from the haven of the Diliman campus. It has also been a year marked with indecision, with insecurities, with plans that never materialized, with books unread, with thoughts unwritten and unsaid, with disappointments, self-constraints and crippling doubts. I know that it hasn't been actually a productive year in terms of travels taken, of tangible outputs, nor of achievements and obstacles overcome.
But in the past year, I guess I opened myself more to the idea of capturing and embracing what the present has to offer as well as welcoming change. Upon introspection, I realized that compared to the previous years, I became more eager to take and hold on to things as they come, to not let opportunities and once-in-a-lifetime chances pass me by. Yet, I also strive to be receptive of doing things that I'm not accustomed to, of lowering my defenses a bit to give way to new ideas and experiences.
As 2014 begins, I hope this openness in the face of transitions continue. I hope I will continue to be less afraid to test the waters and make mistakes. I hope the bonds I've made and will make with people flourish. I hope I get to see more of the world in the form of art to appreciate, of new skills to learn, of adventures to be had.
