A ship to nowhere

I look at you as you look at her. From across the table she's every bit your dream--her long silken hair glowing with the light abovehead, her eyes twinkling in laughter. I see you become disarmed as she smiles at the jokes she's being told. You have been so keen to her whims--a platter of onion rings, an extra fork, a glass of water (without ice, please). She's having fun listening to the others' stories amid the convivial cacophony, and you, the usual bard of the group, contently sits in silence watching her. Once, in the same place, you sat beside me while everybody else was on the floor singing and dancing the night away. Out of the blue and as if I needed telling, you muttered, "I really really like her," your eyes focused on one single person, unobstructed by the dizzying colored lights and the haze from cigarette smoke. And sitting beside you again this time, I wonder why all I could do is look at you as you look at her.


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Experimenting, I guess? Haha.

If you want sense, you have to make it yourself*

These are just some of my favorite tweets by the ex-Panic! At the Disco lead guitarist and then-primary song-smith, Ryan Ross (@thisisryanross). Probably part of the reason why I admire him so is his ability to twist and turn words, and then stringing them together to create startling metaphors and imagery. 

*From "The Phantom Tollbooth" by Norton Juster (Random House, 1961)

Happy birthday, MatsuJun!

Sa'yo nagsimula ang lahat.
Mahal kita kahit/dahil diva ka. :)

Manila is special because Rizal is my hero

Written for J195:

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As part of the country’s celebration of the national hero’s sesquicentennial birth anniversary this year, over 200 participants tasted some of Jose Rizal’s known favourite foods and revisited some of the most historically significant landmarks in Metro Manila.

On the morning of May 20, the Department of Tourism launched the tourism campaign honoring Jose Rizal. It featured a heritage trail to the places in the Philippines where he had set foot on, as well as a special breakfast capturing the tastes from more than a century ago. The itinerary was not fancy, but the places were memorable because they have stood witness to the significant moments of our history.

The program of the heritage trail launch and the pasaporte for Lakbay Rizal @ 150

The most obvious landmark is of course the dutifully-guarded Rizal monument at the Luneta Park, visited not only by Filipinos but even by foreign tourists as well. That morning, a bunch of Koreans were huddled in front of the Park. There was also the improved Rizal Lights and Sound Museum that aimed to bring to life the last moments of Rizal with life-size statues.

For a Filipino who hasn’t visited the Rizal Shrine at Fort Bonifacio, the Hispanic-themed museum was by far the most interesting. The Shrine houses some of the most treasured Rizaliana relics such as some of the clothes he wore displayed in glass cases and permanently stained with time. The walls and the floors were filled with his writings—both from his personal letters and journals, and from his published literary masterpieces.

Probably what caused the most “oohs” from the visiting crowd was the display of a spinal bone of Rizal which a bullet from the firing squad pierced through. It was to me, a concrete and physiological evidence that the national hero was, indeed, a human like all of us—extraordinary, yes, but human.

Unlike other thematic tours, the Lakbay Rizal @150 offers gastronomical treat to the participants with a special buffet of the national hero’s favourite food. As the tour guide explained the bases for selecting a dish to be included in the menu, everybody experienced the tastes Rizal favoured himself during his time. There was the starchy but flavorful pancit miki Maria Clara and Tiya Isabel from Noli me Tangere prepared for Ibarra. There was also the famous tinola with papaya that aggravated Padre Damaso after he was purposedly served with the scrawny neck part of the chicken in El Filibusterismo. There were also sardenas seca tuyo, itlog na pula, and adobo Rizal spoke of in his letters to his family.

To cap the sumptuous meal was a cup of hot rich and bittersweet tsokolate e. As opposed to the bland tsokolate a (with “a” standing for “agua”), tsokolate e was described in Noli as a drink served only for important people, mostly the friars.

The iconic monument of the National Hero at Rizal Park
(Photo from here)

The tour also included a visit to Intamuros, particularly to the Rizaliana sites such as the original location of the Ateneo where Rizal studied and the location of the court where he was tried and sentenced. Ultimately, the last place to be visited was the circular Paco Park where Rizal was unceremoniously buried after he was executed by the firing squad.

The thematic tour all over the Philippines includes a total of around 25 spots. I like history as much as discovering new things, and tracing Rizal’s steps from Laguna to Pampanga to Zamboanga seems like a great adventure waiting to be had.

'How I miss yesterday, how I let it fade away...'*

Sometimes I wonder why I cling onto the bits and pieces of daily life, and the stories and the people I encounter.

I keep instructing my brain to remember a line from a book, a conversation, a scenery, a tiny detail that would probably never mean anything.

"The richness of life lies in the memories we have forgotten," says a graffiti written on a desk in a class room. Does it, I wonder? If we don't know what we've lost, we'll never know how much we should or might have had.

Despite this, and as much as possible still, I try to remember.


*from Memories by Panic! At The Disco